Having Doubt Yet Ever Embraced by Amida Buddha
By Blayne Nakasone | He/Him/His | Kyoto, Japan
Ministerial Candidate
Originally Posted:May 7, 2020
“Each ray of Amida’s light shines universally upon the worlds of the ten quarters, embracing and not forsaking those sentient beings who utter the nenbutsu.” - Kanmuryoju-kyo
Have you ever doubted being a Buddhist? Or questioned your belief in Amida Buddha? You aren’t alone because as human beings we are full of doubt. Shinran Shonin, the founder of Jodo Shinshu, revealed to us what Amida is saying about releasing our doubt and not having to worry about anything else.
I am now a Jodo Shinshu minister, but before as a layperson I had many doubts about Amida Buddha’s wisdom and compassion and the essence of Jodo Shinshu. I didn't understand what it meant to be specifically a Jodo Shinshu Buddhist as compared to other Buddhists sects in Japan and around the world. I barely understood what it meant to say the nembutsu. Yet, I found myself saying it during my school's weekly Friday services.Then I learned about the Eightfold Path and the Six Paramitas and found myself, yet again, questioning everything and the possibility of becoming close to attaining “enlightenment,” or whatever it is called.
“The hardest part of being a Jodo Shinshu Buddhist is when we are in really tough situations and we want to pray for something to happen.”
The hardest part of being a Jodo Shinshu Buddhist is when we are in really tough situations and we want to pray for something to happen. Unlike other religions or other Buddhist traditions, we, as nenbutsu followers, don't turn towards Amida Buddha and wish for things to change. I think having all these doubts is something that is natural and can be used to entrust ourselves wholeheartedly to Amida Buddha. With all these doubts, let me share what I learned about Jodo Shinshu that awakened me to the wisdom and compassion that is Amida Buddha’s teachings.
The first great teaching I learned that started the change my idea and belief in Amida Buddha is the term, 摂取不捨 (Sesshu Fusha). This is the teaching that once Amida Buddha embraces us, no matter what happens to us or whatever we may do, we will never be forsaken and will be forever embraced by Amida. This is something so simple. I realized in my heart that no matter what we do, good or bad, Amida Buddha does not discriminate and accepts us all and knows that, as human beings, we are filled with greed, anger, and stupidity (GAS). The Buddha had already made 48 vows to ensure we are saved unfailingly for our own sake. We may turn our backs on the Buddha, but we can never escape the dharma because there is no corner in the world where Amida Buddha’s teachings do not shine.
This brings us to my second great teaching that can be found in the Muryoju-Kyo (Larger Sutra) or Donran Daishi’s (Tan Luan) San Amida Butsu Ge, or Shinran Shonin’s Jodo Wasan (Pure Land Hymns), they all talk about 12 lights that shine throughout this world. 1. 無量光 (Muryo ko) Immeasurable Light 2. 無辺光 (Muhen ko) Boundless Light 3. 無碍光 (Muge ko) Unhindered Light 4. 無対光 (Mutai ko) Incomparable Light 5. 炎王光 (Enno ko) Light of the King of Flames 6. 清浄光 (Shojo ko) Pure Light 7. 歓喜光 (Kangi ko) Light of Joy 8. 智慧光 (Chie ko) Light of Wisdom 9. 不断光 (Fudan ko) Unceasing Light 10. 難思光 (Nanji ko) Inconceivable Light 11. 無称光 (Musho ko) Ineffable Light 12. 超日月光 (Cho nichigakko) Light Outshining the Sun and Moon These 12 lights shine brightly throughout the world. No matter what we do as human beings filled with GAS, Amida Buddha will unfailingly save us and we can all be born in the Land of Bliss. It may seem hard to sincerely believe in the Buddha full heartedly with just these two points, but we should have a sense of gratitude and appreciation for such a benevolent Buddha that is always working in our favor and that the only words that we can utter is the Nembutsu, Namo Amida Butsu. That alone is more than enough for the Buddha. That action alone of saying the Nembutsu is the work of Amida Buddha that we receive and manifests itself in this world as, Namo Amida Butsu. From that point of saying the Nembutsu, it is in that moment we will never be forsaken by Amida Buddha.
“But the most important thing we can do in each moment, as Jodo Shinshu Buddhists, is to listen. For listening creates stronger faith via deep reflection and conversation as well as listening to Dharma talks.”
This is the start of creating such a profound belief in Amida Buddha. Of course there are many more points and teachings that express Amida Buddha’s call to us, but these are just two of many that I learned which has deeply touched my heart profoundly. If your belief in Amida wavers, remember the Buddha will be there without fail, holding on to you and accepting you as you are. The Dharma surrounds us all in every moment whether we believe it to be there or not. But the most important thing we can do in each moment, as Jodo Shinshu Buddhists, is to listen. For listening creates stronger faith via deep reflection and conversation as well as listening to Dharma talks. With open hearts and ears, I hope we can grow together in the dharma as we continue to walk the nenbutsu path.
